EMDR: Healing the Ghost in the Haunted Mansion
What is EMDR?
EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) is a therapeutic approach that has been researched and proven effective in helping people overcome the haunting grip of traumatic experiences. While the precise neurological mechanics of EMDR remain somewhat mysterious, it's known to be a potent tool for processing trauma.
Some researchers describe EMDR as a way to move traumatic memories from the limbic system where emotions are triggered, to the memory system or hippocampus where memories are normally stored. Other researchers explain it as a means of interrupting patterns and imagery, and some even liken it to exposure therapy. There is substantial evidence to suggest that EMDR incorporates various mechanisms that enable individuals to confront their traumatic memories without being overwhelmed by distressing emotions, ultimately helping them live more fully in the present. EMDR is a remarkably effective treatment for PTSD, anxiety, and several other psychiatric disorders.
EMDR is like a ghost story.
Stepping away from the scientific jargon for a moment, let’s think of EMDR as a ghost story.
In many ghost stories, the plot often revolves around a family moving into an old, haunted house where a terrible trauma occurred. Perhaps it was a sudden and tragic death, maybe even a murder. As a result, a lingering presence, a ghost, remains tethered to this world, unable to move on until the mystery of their death is unraveled and justice is served.
The therapeutic process of EMDR is similar to that ghost story. During EMDR, we revisit memories of events, wrongs that need to be made right and painful experiences that need resolution. Just like in a ghost story, we enter the old, haunted house of our memories. The ghosts of the distressing emotions resurface, often in vague snapshots, out of order and out of focus. We physically feel the old chill of the past. Like many ghost stories, these memories have always been there, even before entering the house, just around a corner, lurking just out of sight. EMDR brings us to the house, the source of the pain, but not directly to the past. That would be impossible.
The Skilled Guide
What sets EMDR apart from a horror novel or a spooky movie is the presence of a guide, a skilled clinician, who walks with you through this eerie mansion of memories. We know how to communicate with ghosts. Well-trained guides help to ensure that you remain safe during the journey, that none of the doors or windows of your emotional world are flung open and, if they are, closed and contained until it is safe again to approach them again. EMDR offers a safe passage through the haunting experiences of your past.
As you walk through your memories in the company of a skilled clinician, you witness what happened. You see the truth of the trauma, the pain you endured, and why it hurt so deeply. For a child, what is traumatic may differ greatly from what is haunting for an adult. But, in most cases, the common thread is the feeling of not being heard, seen, or supported afterward. Things weren't made right, and you weren't made safe afterwards.
In EMDR, a skilled clinician's role is to help create that sense of safety, support, and validation. They guide you through your ghost story to witness what happened to your inner ghost. And once the ghost is seen and heard, once its story is told, it is free to move on. Sometimes the “ghost” transforms into a guide instead of a haunted figure. The memories can now inform instead of terrifying. Having experienced this process, the protagonist becomes the living witness, and the healed ghost can now allow you to live your life more freely and safely in a bright and beautiful home that was once draped in cobwebs of pain. The ghost is willing for you to move on. In practical terms, these memories no longer have the power to trigger pain; they aren’t forgotten, but no longer have power over you.
We don't forget ghosts. We keep their pictures on the wall, we retain their stories, maybe even tell them to those who need to hear them, but once a memory is processed through EMDR, it's no longer a haunting presence in the present. We allow the pain to become a memory, a guide, and a teacher, no longer inflicting present-day suffering. EMDR is like a ghost story, a story that ultimately has a happy ending, just like the ghost that finds peace and moves on.
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